Why I Started Signature 30: A Portrait Experience Celebrating Women in Their 30s

It’s been a year since my personal photoshoot in Amsterdam with Nanda Hagenaars. I found her work after moving to Belgium, and the moment I saw it, I thought: This is the photographer I would loooove to have my portraits taken by. Her work is so emotive, and the way she captures human bodies is just captivating.

0. The Idea

I reached out to Nanda in 2023 when I saw she was organising a Portrait Day. It was a short 30-minute shoot. The cost was slightly lower than a full dedicated session, which sounded appealing, but I didn’t want a rushed or stripped-down experience — where you have no time to get to know the photographer or surroundings, little space to settle in and just enjoy the shoot fully.

So my focus quickly shifted to a full shoot. Back then, it wasn’t something I had budgeted for, but I decided I would make it happen. I wasn’t very successful in saving for the full cost of the shoot, but I just wanted to do it around my birthday. It was my 36th. I really wanted to do it at 35 as that number felt magical, like a midpoint. And then, at 36,

I felt like I could no longer postpone it. I wanted to remember and capture this time in photographs. These last years, this in-between and evolving state. I wanted to remember myself in this time – in a foreign country, with no easy path to see the ones you love, working, building a business, and simply living life day by day.

1. Preparation & Arrival

Getting ready for the shoot and figuring out what to wear was a disaster! I was pushing it away. I was trying to find a dress that I had in mind but nothing really stood out. Eventually, I just tried on what I had, did one more review later, and packed everything that would fit in my bag.

The day before and the morning of the trip, I wasn’t feeling it. I questioned if I really needed all this—all the expenses and if I actually needed to allocate 3 days for it. Somehow it also reminded me of leaving Ukraine. Maybe because I was packing the night before and early in the morning like it was back then.

After I packed though, I felt much better. At ease.

BUT THEN, specially for this day, the public transport in Antwerp was on strike. I thought that the better idea will be to travel by train but then noticed that some of them started having ~15 minute delays and I went for a tram. BAAAAD IDEA, BAD! Never ever choose a transport affected by strike! NEVER. First of all, it was super stressful waiting for it and thinking that if it will not come, I will be left with no other option to be on time. Second of all, when it arrived, it was paaaacked! It was crazy. Next thing – you can be just stuck among the people and not being able to leave the tram. Despite all of this, I did arrive on time.

As I arrived to Amsterdam, I felt out of place again. Everything seemed so foreign and I was wondering again about the whole experience.

But then I discovered a huge bathtub in my hotel room — something I hadn’t noticed when booking. It’s been more than 2 years that I had a bath! (That sounds dramatic but long baths were one of the main features of my life and leaving without it, I am missing out on a lot). The fact that I had that bath meant that I need to buy some bubbles, something to chew and drink, and get into the bubbly bath with something to read, or watch. The task for the evening was Lush store and to get some shampoo as my hotel room didn’t have any! SHOCKER.

In the evening, while I was reviewing my inspiration images for the shoot and Nanda’s work, I was feeling that I still need that dress I had in my mind. The shops were already closed and the last thing that I could do, is to wake up earlier the next day and go shopping before my shoot. I would have at least one hour to do so.

2. The Night Before

I woke up around 5 AM from a bad dream. In it, it was my shoot and the photographer looked nothing like her, it all felt out of place, and the HMUA turned me into an Ice Queen with white make up and a tree-like Ikebana on my head. — Not what I had in mind 🙈.

Funny how dreams often distort what I am looking forward to the most.

3. The Shoot Day

On the morning of the shoot, I went straight to Mango and Zara to look for a dress I had in mind. AND! I was super happy when in the first Mango shop I found the dress I imagined. Elegant, fitted, simple. I visited a few more stores, but nothing else came close. I was sooooo glad I made it!

The studio was lovely. Tucked next to a park, quiet and atmospheric. Inside was an old building with a high ceiling and wooden window frames that reminded me of my family home in the village—the porch there that we spent so much time at and which is one of the best spots for a cup of tea. Which is why, looking at that window frame, I asked if we can do a couple of shots there as well and I am really happy I did as the studio has since moved

and those photos will be always a reminder of one of my favorite places on Earth.

Before the shoot, I chatted with Estefanía (HMUA) and Nanda. I told them about the dream and search for the dress. Then we started with my makeup.

For this shoot I wanted to go full in – with all the hair and makeup as I wanted somebody else to create magic on me and just to give myself a bit of that polished, special look. I wanted to have something natural yet glamourous, with more color and your natural features enhanced. And it was BEAUTIFUL.

The whole day I was feeling like a star and thought that I should do it more often. ✨

4. The Shoot

The whole experience was inspiring, reflective, calm, a little daring, validating—a bit outside my comfort zone, in the best way.

Being early in my own photography business, I saw in this experience a vision of the future: how can it look like in few years. How it is to have your lovely studio next to a beautiful nature with parrots singing outside, with lush greens seen through these old frames that look like the house you spent your childhood in.

How it is being creative, exist and enjoy what you do, where you do it and for whom.

It also reminded me that I should not forget to take care for myself: care for my beautiful hair, care for my body, care for my mind, be in tune with myself, find time to pause and rest, be active and not carried away with all the tasks you need to do forgetting the life around me. Have moments to recharge and restore, energize. To switch from this “I need to make it work now” to “take one step at a time, and don’t lose yourself in your work”.

The whole flow was so calm.

We were just being present in the moment, chatting from time to time.

Overall, it was very warm and comfortable experience. You come to a place and to people you have never seen before, you haven’t really talked, and then you entrust them to capture you in this moment in time, in this body, with or without all your worries or stiffness. It left me with lingering thoughts reflecting on this experience and how it felt, what it is in general for a person being photographed, and it is amazing as a way to see how another human being sees you and creates space for you.

5. Going Back

Leaving was bittersweet. The magic of those three days would dissolve into the everyday. Or would it?

The train ride home was golden. Sunshine, a book, peaceful thoughts. It was a very soulful experience and I was excited to get back and create something beautiful for others.

6. Reflections

At home, I printed all my shots as loose prints. I plan to hang a large one—either on fine art paper with no glass over it or shiny metal—as a reminder of that time. To feel it.

When I was reviewing my photos and selecting my favorites, I shared the link with my mom and a couple of friends. And I was surprised by what they chose as their favorites. Many people loooooved what I wouldn’t have picked myself. And then I realized that people chose images based on how they see ME in life and I focused more on the ones that are visually appealing, that reminded the static look I see in the mirror. They see the whole: movement, expression, imperfection. And they love all of it, AS I AM.

It’s not about the static composed picture, it’s about YOU and EVERYTHING IN YOU.

And it often happens that I like different images than my clients. It’s interesting how everyone’s perception is different. And not only about you and your looks but also about an experience or a job done, or anything else really. And if you have all these differences in perception, should you even care?

There are too many variables, just keep being YOU and do YOUR thing.

Teri Hofford has an amazing YouTube video on this topic.

7. Signature 30

With my own experience, I wanted to offer this kind of space and reason to other people in their 30s who wanted to commemorate this decade with their portraits. A space to mark milestones, reflect on their journey—early 30s, late 30s, triumphs, losses, everything in between.

If you’re in your 30s and want to be part of this collective story, I invite you to join the experience and create a time capsule of the person you are right now.

A story you’ll want to return to for years to come.

– Daria